Lessons About Change

Lessons About Change

The Vision:

As our clients know, the Wellness Collaborative offices have seen some significant changes this year.  We decided to embark on renovations at the beginning of 2020 to make our space more compatible with our needs.  Instead of 2 smaller office suites with 2 waiting rooms and 5 interview rooms, there is now 1 larger office suite with 1 waiting room, 5 interview rooms, and a tea room.

Why didn’t we build another interview room you ask? 

We had identified a need for a shared space where we could rest and renew ourselves, a comfortable room to enjoy snacks and tea, and a place where we could spend time together in conversation, planning, debriefing, laughing, brainstorming between sessions, and generally providing support to each other. We truly wanted to “walk the talk” about living our healthiest lives, and we hoped this addition would offer us what we need to stay well so we can continue to do the work we love in our community for a long time to come.

The Change:

This change required much planning to remove 2 large windows in existing walls, build two walls to create a hallway, make 4 new doorways (2 through existing walls, and 2 through the new walls), and change some of the electrical infrastructure. Then came all of the cosmetic changes, repairs to altered carpeting, trimming, moving furniture, and painting walls.

The process of making the changes involved hundreds of decisions, ongoing communications between ourselves and the contractor,  rental of interview rooms on the second floor throughout the noisiest, dustiest and smelliest phases of construction, and a little pile of money.

Once the paint was barely dry (and it still is not completely finished) along came COVID19! And we realized we have to close this wonderful office and figure out how to continue providing support to our clients offsite and abiding by the new “social distancing” guidelines. The COVID19 change has been challenging on many levels, and now we couldn’t even meet in the newly constructed tea room to talk together and figure things out. WOW! The room is right there and we can’t go in it together!

Well, how ironic is that?!?

The Lessons:

1) Change response is unpredictable:

For some of us even being able to conceive of how all the renovations would work out was difficult from the start. Every step of renovations had it’s challenges, and we each were “invited to change” in different ways, become more adaptable and use our problem solving skills. For some this was energizing and for others it was exhausting. There is no “right way” to react and sometimes change is messy.

We welcomed all reactions and invited openness in communicating how each of us was experiencing the ongoing changes to make it as smooth of a process as possible.

2) Self-compassion:

Some folks might remember our idea last year for a retreat on self-compassion? Well this renovation process invited us to put into practice all the ideas we had about self compassion. It was much easier to discuss on a conceptual level than to actually put it into practice! We never really know how an experience will unfold. Life is full of so many mysteries and the lessons we learn along the way are so invaluable. But it’s hard to remember this in the middle of the chaos! When you remain curious instead of cautious, you can invite whatever there is for you to learn, while you practice compassion for the self.

3) Focus on what brings you energy:

It’s so amazing how when we do an activity we enjoy, the energy we have available for the task actually increases.  We learned to offer to help with the things that give us energy, and step away when the task or the timing felt too draining. We learned to focus on what we are good at and what brings us joy. Some of us are good at big picture planning, others are good at interior decorating decisions, some are amazing painters, and some really enjoy running the vacuum cleaner. Each contribution was valuable and important in the process and we learned to do more of what fills us up, and say “no thanks” (without fear of judgment) to the tasks that were too painful or draining.

4) Ask for what you need:

Everything is easier to accomplish with support. We learned how to work together to accomplish goals, how to change expectations according to energy available, and how to be honest about what we each could offer at various stages and what we each needed in the process. We learned that someone always has the tools or talents or knowledge that is needed. And when you admit that you don’t know something and are willing to learn, you are expanding your neuropathways by trying new things. 

5) Change brings opportunity:

During the renovation process there were many rich conversations that occurred about a wide range of topics. We learned from each other not only renovation skills, but life skills. One afternoon there were 4 of us in one small office painting different things, one painting the top edge of the wall, one using the paint roller, one painting in the window sill, and one keeping the carpet covered with sheets and refilling paint trays. The conversation that unfolded was inspiring,

And so now… here we are again!

We are taking these recently refined office renovations lessons and figuring out how to apply them to the new life renovations that have occurred this week with COVID19. The situation is unpredictable, we need to practice self-compassion daily, we need to focus on the things that bring us joy, ask for what we need from those in our support system and in our community, and look for the opportunities that the change is bringing us.

Who knew these life lessons that we learned in January and February would be so helpful to us in March!?!?

We wish we could be in our newly renovated space to work together to create solutions, but we are doing the best with can with the benefits of modern technology and we are so thankful for the ability to connect from 7 different homes in 3 different cities.

We welcome your ideas for managing the current challenges as we all learn together how to manage this huge global change while we continue to provide the counselling and support that is needed.

Kathryn Wagner, MSW, RSW